Culled from NewsmakersNG
Sekinah Lawal/
She was 42 years old when she started looking for a baby because she delayed childbearing pursuing her education, higher carrier and had resorted to using birth control pills.
She could have started child-bearing at age 30 or frozen her eggs, but she was not ready and had not found her choice.
Medical Director, Continental Fertility Clinic, Dr Gani Yahaya spoke about this condition.
After several years of looking for the fruits of the womb when she eventually got married; on this particular morning, when she was with her doctor, he suggested eggs donation after looking at her blood test.
She asked him: What do you call that?
His reply: Getting eggs from a young girl, making babies from these eggs, fertilizing the eggs with your husband’s sperm and putting the babies into your womb.
“I was so annoyed, hoping we wouldn’t be going to that extent. I totally disagreed without even giving it a thought for a second.
“I was distant and got carried away when the doctor was showing us the difference between a young egg, below 30 years and the old egg above 40 years on his computer,” she told NewsmakersNG.
The question going through her mind was: Will the resultant baby from stranger`s eggs look like me?
“What will people have to say about me?”
The doctor said. “The reasons for eggs donations are the failure of ovaries or sex organs at a young age, poor eggs in number and makeup at old age, fear of transmitting hereditary diseases from the mother to the unborn child and better choice for other women, who are not menstruating again.”
She asked: “Most women find the idea of egg donation annoying. I belong to this class of women. Will the resultant babies from stranger’s eggs look like me?”
Dr Yahaya added: “Studies have shown that women who undergo a donation program, even surrogate mothers may pass some hereditary materials to their unborn children through fluid surrounding their babies.
“These materials determine the baby’s looks, acquisition of diseases at the time of conception. Nobody will know that you go through a donation program unless you decide to inform them.
“If you have problems having your own baby, don’t you think you should pull yourself out of the physical and emotional stress by having a hereditary-related baby when your husband’s sperm is used or a biologically-related baby when donor sperm is used?
“I believe it is worth considering but most women turn deaf ears to this lofty program.”
“I was not interested,” she said. “He shook his head and told me that I had a 4.9 to 1% chances of achieving pregnancy.
“Here, I was livid with anger! I accused him of playing God. Expectedly, infertility is associated with a psychological problem. I got annoyed easily with everybody at home and my place of work. I was getting frustrated. I became suspicious of everybody around me.”
“Then, I felt doctors are very exploitative! Using stranger’s eggs! How was he so sure it was going to work? He was only interested in our money. I charged at my husband when we got home.”
Going down memory lane, she added, “The whole problem started about 5 years ago when I started bleeding. My Ultrasound Scan showed that there was a baby with a heartbeat. A week after, the baby had disappeared. It was a devastating loss!
“The desire to become a mother overwhelmed me. It haunted me thereafter. I consoled myself that I was going to have it easier the next time, but it was followed by another miscarriage.
“I was moving from hope to despair, a roller coaster of emotions. Several tests after became terrible with many failed attempts at In-Vitro Fertilization, IVF.
“I had to settle for donor eggs. It was time to face reality because my fertility potential is next to nothing. After pulling, pushing and probing donation program, I realized that women of my age have no other choice.
“When you have an option, it is better to choose it over infertility. I had to forgo my ego. We went for egg donation.
“Today, I am an expectant mother with five months of pregnancy, experiencing maternal and child bonding through pregnancy, expecting to deliver and breast-feed my baby.”
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